We’ve all been there. We’ve all had a job that either kept us so busy that we didn’t know how to keep up or we just felt like we couldn’t handle being there one more minute, let alone one more day. So, how do we cope? Most of us would say by complaining, right? The Cut ran an article on April 22, 2019 discussing how complaining turns co-workers into friends.
I think most of us can relate to this since we’ve had at least one job in our careers that we didn’t love or wasn’t the right fit. Let’s take a look at why this is important and how it’s also a sign of something much bigger.
Forming bonds is healthy and a not only a necessary part of maintaining a healthy work-life balance, but it can also become a coping a mechanism. When we are carefully forming those bonds around those that we work with and getting to know each other, what we are really doing is evaluating each other and our values to see if we trust each other enough to share those complaints. Once we do, then it becomes a close friendship because there is a deep level of trust.
Complaining has been said to be a good way to develop friendships in the workplace. Using work-related complaints to acquire those friendships also can feel less risky than discussing personal topics to get to know our fellow co-workers.
However, what don’t we know about forming friendships in the workplace? Is there more than what meets the eye?
Complaining spreads like wildfire and can infect teams and a workplace. It can keep morale down and keep even the best employees from being productive.
According to the Harvard Business Journal, corporate culture is a powerful driver of human thought and behavior. It tells us what is revered and profane, what is right and wrong, good and bad. Corporate culture is what keeps us in line and ensures that we say, think, and do the right thing. “Right” is defined by our tribe, which is oftentimes our organizations. However, what happens when our tribe- and our organization are toxic?
The problem with getting to know someone in this way- by complaining- is that we are not fully getting to know them. So, how do we know if someone is a toxic employee?
Start by looking for the “dark triad”. Those with the tendency to exhibit one set of specific traits, which are known as the dark triad, oftentimes tend to be toxic employees or leaders.
Some additional signs of a toxic employee include:
Instituting a new culture doesn’t happen overnight. In fact, it can take some time because it requires changes in behavior. Remember, the next time you sit down with your co-worker to complain and criticize that it could have powerful consequences and negatively impacting those around you more than you may realize.
April is National Stress Awareness Month. It is important that during this time, we discuss what we can do to decrease our levels. However, what about workplace stress? According to the American Institute of Stress, there are numerous studies which show that workplace stress is the major source of stress for American adults and that it has progressively escalated over the past few decades. Increased levels of job stress have been associated with increased rates of heart attacks, hypertension, and other disorders. What are some of the main causes of this stress? 46% cite their workload, 28% mention people issues, 20% state juggling work and their personal lives, and 6% believe it is a lack of job security.
Stress is a highly personalized experience and can vary widely, even in identical situations for various reasons. One’s job stress and the severity of it is dependent on the extent of the demands that are being made and the individual’s sense of control or decision-making leeway is provided in dealing with them. There are scientific studies based on this model, which confirm that employees who sense that they are subjected to high demands but have little control are at an increased risk for cardiovascular disease.
It also has been found that occupations do not really matter because some individuals thrive in different types of fast-paced or slow-paced types of occupations. In other words, the type of role for an individual is very key to their levels of stress and managing them. This is why finding your dream career can also change your life.
Yes, this is true! Is it worth it to put your health and life at risk everyday just to stay in a position that makes us feel bored, anxious, stressed, or frustrated – and ultimately, unhappy? No, it’s not. You may think that it’s impossible to find a career that you love and doesn’t leave you feeling drained or unfulfilled but that’s simply not true. Your own happiness and fulfillment should be enough reason to make a switch, however, if it’s not- living a longer life should be.
What are some reasons that a fulfilling career leads to a healthier and happier life? Let’s take a look at some.
In short, if you are unhappy with your career, then taking control of your health and stress levels is very much worth it. Our workplaces may be a major source of our stress; however, we have control over if we want to remain in a dead-end, thankless, unfulfilled position that gives you a case of the “Sundays blues” every evening and every weekend.
If you’re tired of constant slights and snubs in your workplace, you could be dealing with microaggressions from colleagues. Company culture starts at the top and is reinforced by managers, which means that toxic work cultures breed an environment of generally offensive behavior, including harassment and intimidation.
Nepotism is a form of discrimination in which friends and//or family members are hired for reasons that do not necessarily have anything to do with their experience, knowledge, or skills. Nepotism is not necessarily illegal either. However, it can create conflicts in the workplace and be troublesome if they are in a superior-subordinate relationship.
Inequality takes many forms and manifests in numerous manners. However, what does unconscious bias do to our workplaces? As women, we deal with more in the workplace than our male counterparts, including unconscious bias. Unconscious bias are social stereotypes about certain groups of people that individuals form outside their unconscious awareness.
Sexual harassment has become one of the most prevalent workplace and HR topics. Sexual harassment has been illegal since 1986 and in that time, most of the training has focused on how to avoid liability, not how to improve workplace culture.
Women talk less than men. It is only a societal myth that we talk more. When was the last meeting you went to in which the women spoke longer and in more detail?
When you work for a micromanager, you may feel like your boss doesn’t trust you to do your job. It can be difficult to perform well and bring new ideas to the table when someone is constantly checking up on you and scrutinizing your work processes.
Ultimately, the issue lies within gender bias overtaking our workplaces. It is when we allow the stereotypical roles to take over our workplaces that office housework can become a problem. If we can split the chores at home; we should have the ability to split them at work as well.